Last week, I typed that I would be attempting to read a number of books, I unofficially DNF’d. In true self-sabotage fashion, I didn’t listen or bring up any of them on a tablet or laptop, in the last seven days. I constantly know what I have to do, procrastinate, and then rush to get things done before the deadline. I also do this, type about my shortcomings on this blog. It is supposed to be accountability but I am very good at typing how sorry and miserable I am for not doing what I am supposed to do. I also type these things in commiseration. I know there is a writer like me out there thinking that they are the only one that is not meeting their writing goals. Not just you, not just me there are thousands of us out there in the ocean of the internet. Some of us have legitimate reasons, work, family, mental state, and environment. Some of us have valid meh reasons. It doesn’t matter that it is meh, the important part is that it is valid. Working through fear, doubt, judgment can take a lot out of a person. On a really good writing day, I might bask in Asian dramas and anime for the next 3 days following. My brain, completely numb to the next part of the story. One of the reasons I wanted to start to write creative non-fiction. I wanted to level up my writing skill. Then the real Universe worked against me.
Here is another random thought, I don’t think we, people in general are going to say at the end of the year, “this was a good one, sad to see it go.” Many of us are like 2020 can go to hell, 2021 should follow it, with gasoline draws. but maybe wood this time b/c gas is expensive. Some of us want a redo but we can only change ourselves not the past.
Back to the first thought, what to do when none of your goals are being achieved? The one thing I have found effective is accepting the past. Shake off the negative thoughts. Apologize if it is helpful and then do the work for change. This may not work the first time. Please remember that positive change takes time. It has been said it takes about 28 days to change a habit. Expect the same and also prepare for not reaching the goal next time. This is not a one-and-done type of situation. Write down positive affirmations, feelings and prepare to do better.
Remember the only one that can write your story is you. Please leave a comment, like, and subscribe.